Family Proclamation Blog Hop: Mom's Search for Meaning

A calling is an offering.

It's giving the best of yourself to a cause that you believe in.
And the price for having the opportunity for giving an offering is that you have to make some sacrifices.

- Jeffrey A. Thompson

Romney Institute of Public Management

Marriott School of Management

Brigham Young University

In September of 1995, I was a senior in high school.  

As a young, bright, over-achieving student I had definite plans for my future.  I had been accepted to BYU, and was intending to major in microbiology, with a minor in English.  I was planning on a career path in the medical field, or perhaps education.  The world seemed to be my metaphorical oyster.  


That same month, President Hinckley read The Family: A Proclamation to the World to a worldwide audience at the general Relief Society meeting of the church.


When I first studied it, I must admit that I balked a little at some of the phrases used to describe the role of women.  At the time, I bought into society's idea that a woman's worth was based mainly on what she did outside of the home rather than inside it.  Ironic, considering that my greatest role model was my own mother, a stay-at-home mom.  But I had lofty ambitions.  I was going to change the world!  Surely that was more important than the mundane daily obligations of being *only* a wife and mother.  And so I went on my merry way, confident in the path of my choosing.  


Oh, how misguided I was.


A lot has changed in sixteen years.  I look back at that young naive girl and feel, well, sorry for her.  Clearly, she had a lot to learn.

About two years ago I listened to a favorite radio program that discussed an interesting study done by BYU professor Jeffrey Thompson on meaningful work.  His research focused on a group of zookeepers, and the sense of calling that so many of them had about their chosen career.  For these zookeepers, the low pay and little recognition they received were unimportant, because deep in their hearts they knew that they were using their talents to do what they were meant to do.   

Professor Thompson related an interesting story from their study in which a nun with a group of students on a field trip to the zoo paused to watch a zookeeper cleaning up after his animals.  To her students she instructed, "This is why you need to go to college, because otherwise you will end up doing something like this."  While it is most certain that she did not intend her words to be heard by the zookeeper, he was unfortunately within earshot and did hear the remarks in full.  This zookeeper, presumed to have so little education was, in fact, in possession of a Master's degree in zoology.  So why did he choose such a seemingly humble career?


The reason is that he unequivocally felt called to do this work.  He felt that he had been given a God-given talent that predisposed him to serve in this manner.  And because of this calling, his work was far from menial in his eyes.  To the contrary, it was ennobling. 

Over the years I have thought a lot about what it truly means to be a mom.  

About the choices I made in life that led me here, to this moment.  The paths that were not taken.  The sacrifices that were made.  And I always come to the same ultimate conclusion:  I wouldn't change a thing.  

Which is not to say that I don't have any regrets.  

I most certainly do.

And I do not mean to imply that I am exceptional at being a parent.  

I am most certainly not.

But when I look on my life with my husband and my four children, there is a peace and joy that I feel that is undeniable.  
I am living my own personal calling in life.  This is what I was meant to do.


The Proclamation on the Family states:

Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. ‘Children are an heritage of the Lord’ (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness...

Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ...  By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.

The world would have us believe that a mother's work is menial, ignoble, and somewhat unimportant when compared to other other options available.
The world would set us up as an example, to metaphorically say like the well-intentioned nun, "this is why women must go to college and get an education!" 
The world would call us repressed.
The world is wrong.


As mothers, we carry the responsibility of bringing the sons and daughters of God into the world and loving, nurturing, and teaching them to the best of our ability so that they might gain Eternal Life.  What on earth could possibly be more important than that?


There are some days when I look around at my crazy wonderful life-- bleary-eyed from lack of sleep, a house of definite disorder, with crying sick/teething/grumpy children -- and wonder what some of my like-minded over-achieving high school friends would think.  I think of them fondly, with their impressive resumes and careers that take them around the globe.  They are doing great things-- important things-- with their higher education.


But guess what?
So am I.


And I wouldn't have it any other way.